Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

“Sigh, it’s not interesting at all with such low-level opponents.”

By the time I finished the fight which started for reasons unknown, I pretty much figured out what was going on.

It seemed to be my fault, after all. Without realizing it, I had entered the royal palace district while it was still dark. Not only that, I misunderstood the spies reporting their respective number princes’ factions as some sort of code, which was why these highly tensed spies moved against me.

By the way, I only learned this after asking all of them. The first few I asked either attempted to take me down with them while committing suicide or were killed off suddenly by flying darts and arrows that came out of nowhere. It seemed like an archaic, third-rate film where the villains killed their own subordinates to keep them from talking.

Finally, after I learned what was going on, I didn’t want to stay any more in this area. I felt it to be truly amusing looking at all the black-clothed individuals on the rooftops to both sides of me as I walked out of here. I could also feel that there wasn’t as much chaos as there could have been.

“So the Crown of Thorns is still here?”

The two hereditary God Equipment of the Mist Kingdom were the Roland Sacred Sword and the Crown of Thorns. I’d already given the prior over to Reyne, while the latter had been lost to time.

However, when I was doing my System’s Quests, the System had notified me that I personally handed the Crown of Thorns over to the Bardi royalty, and that I had then intentionally wiped my own memory. Since the Bardi royalty had yet to be foundationally shaken, and since I hadn’t heard of the Crown of Thorns being sold on the black market, there was a very good chance it was still held by the Bardi Empire.

[Crown of Thorns, God Equipment.]

[Blessing of the Undying. The wearer of the Crown of Thorns cannot die. Even if the wearer’s body is shattered into tiny pieces, the body will still be reformed.]

[Curse of the Undying. The wearer of the Crown of Thorns will lose their sense of taste, smell, and touch—they would be similar to a zombie.]

[Death of the Undying. The moment the wearer removes or has the Crown of Thorns removed, every bit of pain suffered while wearing the Crown of Thorns will instantly be sensed. Before the wearer perishes, they will be kept alive and suffer all the accumulated pain before dying.]

The effect looked extraordinarily powerful. As long as you wore it, you would be truly undying. Not only that, you would be able to turn into a Berserker who didn’t know pain or even fatigue. But according to the Mist Kingdom’s ancestral kings, rather than calling the Crown of Thorns a powerful God Equipment, it was more like a frightening cursed equipment.

Indeed, the wearer wouldn’t die, nor would he or she feel any pain. However, if their body parts were shattered into tiny pieces or decayed and rotten, the Crown of Thorns would forcibly reform their body, still in that state. However, the flesh would no longer be living and it would continue to rot and fester. No ordinary person would be able to bear viewing their own body in such a condition, would they?

That Curse of the Undying part was indeed a curse. A Berserker who wouldn’t feel any pain, you say? Losing the three senses of touch, taste, and smell also meant losing your desires and goals. Any food you ate would be tasteless. Any woman a man touched wouldn’t have any warmth. After wearing the Crown of Thorns for a sufficiently long period of time, that person would be no different from an undead, despite not being an undead.

As for the final effect, the Death of the Undying? It was said that a person who had the Crown of Thorns removed would scream painfully at the top of their lungs for more than three months without being able to die, each experience of pain fresh and different. Finally, that person would shatter into pieces with the most agonizing of screams.

What? Something like this was actually a God Equipment? This was indeed a God Equipment. God Equipment were typically as powerful as this one, together with tremendous drawbacks. Either the negative side effects would be ridiculously horrendous, or only Gods would be able to use a particular God Equipment. The only God Equipment I’d ever seen being casually used by mortals was the Roland Sacred Sword. And this sword was formed as its Concept of Guarding kept increasing its power. Back in the day, apart from being indestructible, it didn’t have a single other useful ability.

A God Equipment was typically half of a God’s soul. Other Gods who obtained the God Equipment would be capable of analyzing the secrets within. Even if a God had perished, their God Equipment would be worthy of being sought after.

The Crown of Thorns was a strange one among strange ones. You say it isn’t powerful? A SemiGod wearing it would easily be able to exchange blows all day long, not caring about any injuries suffered, and easily defeat five other SemiGods simultaneously. But you say it’s powerful? No ordinary person would be willing to wear it.

In that despairing battle where the Mist Kingdom was destroyed, the Mist Kingdom’s strongest knight, Caesar En, put on the Crown of Thorns. Although he was only a Myth, he caused tremendous losses to his enemies. But the end result was that he was sealed away and the Crown of Thorns forcibly removed from him. Judging from how Caesar’s soul never answered my summons, perhaps he had sunk into eternal sleep as a consequence of using the Crown of Thorns.

Me wanting to recover the Crown of Thorns wasn’t to use it. It was far too abnormal in every way. But since it was a relic left behind by the Mist Kingdom’s ancestors, the Descendants of the Mist would naturally want to recover it.

Of course, I had my own method for finding this lost artifact belonging to my ancestors.

“The Broken Thorn has no reaction.”

The Broken Thorn was a small, torn-off portion of the Crown of Thorns. When Kelly learned that I was searching for the Crown of Thorns, she told me to take the Broken Thorn. As long as the Broken Thorn was within a close enough distance to the Crown of Thorns, it would show a reaction.

Unfortunately for me, I walked all over the Bardi capital with no reaction. This meant that the Crown of Thorns was either no longer in the capital or that someone was already wearing it.

“I feel that neither is a good result for me.”

I was thinking about such matters as I walked out of the troublesome royal palace district. I entered a brightly lit business district, which was most likely the district that Halent told me Cher was currently staying in.

The next moment, I knew for sure that Cher was staying here. I then instantly hid myself in a nearby alleyway.

A pitch-black horse-drawn carriage was proceeding on the street, while countless rotten eggs and apples were chucked at it. Lots of middle-aged women and men were running after the carriage, ranting angrily. Yet the horse-drawn carriage was able to remain undamaged due to a blue protective magic barrier blocking the projectiles. Meanwhile, the person casting this magic barrier was roaring back at the crowd, sticking up her middle fingers: Cher, the Mage Country’s official ambassador to the Bardi Empire.

“I recall she was a lady, wasn’t she?”

“Yep. But actually, before I met you, I was a lady as well.”

The silly cat’s retort was so logical that I didn’t even know how to respond. And so I carefully made myself smaller so that Cher wouldn’t notice my presence.

Being able to force someone previously known by the moniker of “Iron” into a crazy woman who didn’t even care about her appearance? Her pressure and accumulated grudges must have been enormous. If she caught me, I would face a huge trouble.

Right afterwards came a familiar scene. An eagle-masked muscular individual ran out in front while naked, with a large group of guards chasing after him.

“That’s Eaglest—”

“No, that’s just a random pervert passing by.”

I felt like my country’s international image was still salvageable, but if reports about how only bastards like Eaglestorm were around me, then its image would become truly unsalvageable. Just as I was intending to pretend not to see anything, my System took this perfect opportunity to come out and spread chaos yet again.

[Daily Quest which you haven’t seen for a long time: Make everyone face their true inner naked selves!]

[Quest Requirements: Let us abandon our useless clothing and return to the natural state of nature. Making 100 people naked will complete this Quest and reward you with 200 Fate Points. Each additional zero you add on to the number of people you make naked will double your Fate Points reward.]

[Quest Failure Punishment: A show where Princess Peach runs naked in front of everyone. System Notification: This is a free chance for you to obtain some Fate Points. Make sure to grab this opportunity!]

“Making 100 people become naked will reward me with 200 Fate Points? Then 1000 = 400, 10,000 = 800, 100,000 = 1600, 1,000,000 = 3200, and 10,000,000 = 6400 Fate Points... I’ve heard that the Bardi capital has approximately 10,000,000 residents...”

I immediately came to a decision after performing some calculations. Of course, I wasn’t allured by the prospect of Fate Points—obviously not! This was all for the sake of taking revenge for my cute little “daughter,” Cher!

“Foolish citizens of Bardi, you dare to harm my Fate Points—er—I mean daughter! Taste the wrath of an Oni Chichi! Harloys, do you still have original samples of your Greed Slime bodies? I know you have them. If not, replicate them for me immediately. I need as many as possible.”

Cough, from a certain standpoint, I once again made history as all the citizens of Bardi once again witnessed the insanity of this visitor...