Novel Bin Ch157.1 - The Dream Ends (1)
Chapter Ch157.1 - The Dream Ends (1)
Translated by Eve
Edited by Serefina
15. The Dream Ends (1)
Han Wenqian looked at the door with a dim expression in his eyes. Some time later, he lowered his head, expression serene, as he carefully tucked Xie He in. He then left, closing the door gently behind him.
Mother Han stared at Han Wenqian in shock, her voice filled with utter astonishment. “You...you....”
Han Wenqian had a faint smile on his lips. He did not hesitate at all as he said, “Yes. I love him.”
Mother Han didn’t think that the other would confirm her suspicions without even attempting to cover it up. Her eyes were full of incredulity and other complicated emotions! Soon after, she gave him an angry glare and said, “He’s your younger brother!”
Her mind was a mess. There was only one thought in her head: this was wrong!
When she recalled the thick emotion in Han Wenqian’s eyes when he had kissed Xie He, she suddenly connected the dots to the little things she’d noticed recently. She recalled how Xie He would occasionally seem to fear Han Wenqian and how he would try to avoid him. The former always looked like he had something on his mind, but couldn’t say anything.... It couldn’t be...except for the framing incident, what else could it be? But...if Han Wenqian loved him, why did he frame the other and force him? He had even tried to ruin him.
Mother Han sized Han Wenqian up. She only felt that this son of hers, who she had never had to worry about, had become a stranger to her at some unknown point in time.... She couldn’t read him at all.
Han Wenqian took a step forward and lowered his head in deference. He said, “Mom, let’s talk downstairs. It was difficult for Xiao Xin to fall asleep. Let’s not wake him up.”
Mother Han Wenqian followed him to the first floor in a daze. She regarded Han Wenqian with a complicated gaze. She asks, “Tell me, what’s going on?”
Han Wenqian’s expression did not change from beginning to end. There was no panic from having been exposed either. His voice was steady and low. “I told you guys before. I didn’t do that to him over the family assets. I did it...because of a misunderstanding. But you and Dad wouldn’t believe me. I also can’t explain the exact reason for why I did what I did.
“I can only say that I already know that I was wrong. Furthermore, I truly love him. I will never hurt him again.”
Mother Han’s heart was in chaos. Her speech sounded a bit incoherent. “B-but...how can you be in love with him?”
She indeed loved Lin Xin dearly but Han Wenqian was her biological son. She was extremely angry at his actions, but since Han Wenqian had admitted his wrongs and was willing to make it up to Lin Xin, she would not question him further.... She could only express her apology to Lin Xin by treating him well.
She thought that Han Wenqian should indeed make things up to Lin Xin but... how could he have fallen in love with him! In her eyes, Lin Xin was Han Wenqian’s younger brother!
They should not be together! Furthermore, now that such a thing had happened between them, how could they ever be happy together?
Although Mother Han was in a state of great shock, she was still a mature woman. She was able to keep herself calm. She asked, “Does he know you love him?”
Han Wenqian was silent for a while. “He doesn’t believe me.”
Mother Han gave him a disappointed look. “It’s normal for him to not believe you after being hurt like that. Did you really think he would accept you?” She said this because she wanted to dash any untoward thoughts Han Wenqian may have. She wanted to nip it at the bud.
Who would have expected that Han Wenqian would laugh and say, “I know.”
Mother Han was startled. “And you still....”
There was a faint smile in Han Wenqian’s eyes. He earnestly said, “You don’t have anything to worry about. I don’t need him to accept or forgive me. I don’t plan on changing things. I only wanted to tell you that I love him. Aside from that, nothing will change. He will still be my younger brother and you will still be his mother.... I will continue playing the part of a proper son and older brother. I just hope that you won’t hold any preposterous thoughts and become dissatisfied with him because of my unrequited love. This is all my fault. It has nothing to do with him.”
Mother Han did not expect his words. She had just tried to dash all of Han Wenqian’s hopes. However, for some reason, she now asked, “You love him but still plan on being his big brother?”
Han Wenqian nodded.
Mother Han could see the earnestness and dedication in his eyes. A long time later, she heaved a helpless sigh. Right then, she believed that Han Wenqian was being truthful. He really, really loved Lin Xin.
If it was before, perhaps she would have put an end to this...but when she thought of the state Lin Xin was in now, as well as Han Wenqian’s behaviour, she just felt tired and powerless. It was the Han Family that owed Lin Xin. In the end, she slowly said, “I’m going to pretend I didn’t see anything today...you...do your best.”
After saying this, she went upstairs.
Han Wenqian watched his mother leave. In a quiet voice, he said, “Thank you.”
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Xie He slept well that night. Every day, he slept and ate and didn’t have to go to class or work. Spending every day being treated as the apple of everyone’s eyes, being coaxed and treated with utmost care, was pretty good. The only thing that sucked in this otherwise good life was his lack of a sex life.
Xie He watched and commented on the recording of last night that 444 was playing for him. He was in a pretty goo mood.
【Xie He：Gege is truly a responsible person. But Mother Han is also quite a good person. Selfishness is a common feeling for humans. It’s not necessarily always a bad thing. She really does care for Lin Xin to some extent.】
【444：(⊙o⊙) I see.】
【Xie He：It’s been a long time. Gege’s Favourability Value can be maxed out at any time. How’s Xiao Qin doing these days?】
【444：He’s about to leave.】
【Xie He：I think he’ll come see me once more before leaving. 】
Since the day his classmates and his teacher had come for a visit, Xie He’s mood seemed to have stabilized quite a bit. He was no longer temperamental and had stopped making a fuss about wanting his drugs. He passed his days peacefully. One day, at long last...he once again pushed open the door to the piano room across the hall.
The white piano sat there quietly. Although it had not been in use for a long time, there was not a speck of dust on it. It seemed like someone had been taking meticulous care of it. Xie He pushed open the cover and gazed down at the white and black keys. He stared at them, not moving an inch.
A long time later, he slowly reached out and gently placed his fingers on the keys.
His fingers were no longer nimble as they once were. They were also currently still bandaged. He could only curve his fingers slightly. Despite this, the slight exertion still caused him pain. He couldn’t even use chopsticks, let alone play the piano.
He had been avoiding this place the whole time because the fact that he had lost the hands needed to pursue his dreams made him hurt so much he wanted to die.
He couldn’t even look directly at his own hands....
Xie He’s mind was filled with songs, but he could only play a simple tune now. After some time, he felt that the bandaging was in the way, so he tore it off with his teeth. The bandages fell to the ground, exposing his warped, ugly hands.
Xie He didn’t care. His hands began to play. The intense pain could not stop him. He did everything he could and used all the strength he had to play!
Despite this, all that came out were discordant notes. His hands trembled in pain....
There was only grief and helplessness in his eyes.
Han Wenqian had been silently standing at the door for a long time. When he saw Xie He stop, he entered and gently picked up Xie He’s hands. He frowned and said, “Don’t be in a hurry. Take your time.”
Xie He gave Han Wenqian a cold glance and pulled his hands back.
A flicker of sadness passed through Han Wenqian’s eyes. After some time, he smiled again and said, “Come down to eat. Mom told me to come call you.”
Xie He followed Han Wenqian down. Mother and Father Han were already waiting for him at the dining table. Mother Han Wenqian’s eyes hid a complicated emotion but she still smiled gently at Xie He like normal. She didn’t act any different..
Han Wenqian sat next to Xie He and prepared to feed him.
Xie He didn’t open his mouth this time, however. He turned his face away and said, “I want to eat on my own.”
Han Wenqian’s expression changed. He paused and then placed the spoon in Xie He’s hands. With a soft voice, he said, “OK. But don’t force yourself.”
This was the first time Xie He had said he wanted to eat on his own since the accident. It was the first time he had expressed a desire to change things. Han Wenqian could not control the ripples in his heart..... He yearned for Xie He to be able to step out on his own sooner, but was also worried that Xie He would become depressed again. Han Wenqian felt conflicted. He felt like he was walking on a tightrope.
Xie He gripped the spoon and used it to scoop up some soup. As a result, the spoon fell into the bowl, as his grip was not steady. He looked down. Some time later, he used both hands to hold the spoon. Like this, the spoon wouldn’t fall so easily. He was able to slowly eat on his own.
Han Wenqian watched him with a nervous gaze the entire time. He hadn’t even touched his own food.
Mother Han watched them silently. If it was before, she would have thought that Han Wenqian was being this caring for his younger brother out of regret and pain. But after what she saw last night...she realized that this was, indeed, love. It was just a pity that even she knew that...Han Wenqian’s love would never be reciprocated.
Mother Han felt upset watching this so she decided not look anymore.
Xie He slowly used his spoon, and finished a meal on his own for the first time. After eating, he went upstairs, not speaking another word, and continued to space out while sitting in the piano room. Occasionally, it would look like he thought of something and he would hit a few notes on the piano.
Days passed.
During this time, Xie He’s classmates had come to see him a few times. With the company of his classmates, Xie He’s mood seemed to become much better. He would even occasionally flash a rare smile.
Today, Xie He was once again spacing out in the piano room. The family servants informed him that he had a guest.
Xie He thought that it was his classmates. Who would have expected that upon reaching the first floor, he would find out that the person waiting for him in the living room was actually Qin Ye.
Qin Ye smiled at Xie He. “Long time no see.”
Even in his dreams, Xie He didn’t think that he’d see Qin Ye in the Han Family home. He suddenly felt a bit nervous. “W-why have you come here?”
Qin Ye smiled. “Are you surprised?”
Actually, he didn’t think that Han Wenqian would allow him to see Xie He. Qin Ye was about to leave the country. He had come here with hatred but was now leaving without it. The only thing he couldn’t put down was Xie He. Therefore, he had taken the risk and gone to see Han Wenqian. He wanted to try once more to see Xie He for the last time.
He had thought that Han Wenqian wouldn’t agree. Who would have expected that he actually would?
Xie He nodded. He still remembered that there was a grudge between Qin Ye and the Han Family.
Qin Ye looked at Xie He. The young man looked better than he had been before. It seemed that Han Wenqian really was taking good care of him. This way, even if he left, he could leave assured....
Qin Ye stood in front of Xie He. He hesitated and then quietly said, “I’m leaving soon.”
This made him finally realize something. If revenge bred revenge, would there ever be an end to it? He thought that perhaps he would finally be able to walk away from it. The only thing he regretted was that, although he had fallen in love, he could not be with the one he loved.
Qin Ye gave Xie He an affectionate look. “Live well.”
Xie He stared back silently and nodded.
Qin Ye hugged Xie He softly. He didn’t say anything more and left.
He was afraid that if he stayed too long, he’d begin to have inappropriate thoughts, that he would once again implicate Xie He in his selfishness, and cause him pain. He didn’t want to hurt Xie He anymore.... This person had already suffered enough.
He would express his love for the other by letting him return to a peaceful life. He would remove himself from Xie He’s life and never bother him again.
【Ding, Qin Ye’s Favourability Value +5. The current Favourability Value is 100.】
Xie He watched Qin Ye leave. He looked like he didn’t understand why this person had wanted to see him, or why he had said such cryptic words.
He turned to return to the piano room.
【Xie He：Finally done with Xiao Qin. It’s about time to say goodbye to Gege. Smile.JPG】
【444：(⊙v⊙) Mn, you’re ready to leave?】
【Xie He：Yes. 】
....................................
Although Han Wenqian wasn’t home, the help reported to him everything Qin Ye and Xie He did. A self-deprecating smile appeared on his lips. Why had he been so blind? Why had he been so certain there was something between Xie He and Qin Ye? It was obvious that his younger brother...didn’t care about that person at all. Xie He only cared about his family, only cared about Han Wenqian....
But he had personally ruined the other’s precious emotions. Now, he was no longer the recipient of Xie He’s reliant, trusting gaze.
Only after losing it, did he realize how precious it was. And he regretted it terribly.
Han Wenqian continued to throw himself into his work. Only by busying himself with work could he temporarily suppress the inconsolable pain in his chest. It gave him no time to overthink matters.
Everything became peaceful again, aside from his non-erasable wounds.... Han Wenqian would leave for work early and return late in the night. Meanwhile, Xie He still stayed perpetually at home. Although he looked much more normal now, he never left the house. It was like he had carved out a separate little world for himself and was unwilling to leave it.
Although Han Wenqian was worried, he didn’t dare push the other too hard. All he did was take careful care of Xie He the whole time.
Today was the weekend. Han Wenqian came to Xie He’s room as usual and asked him in a gentle voice, “Xiao Xin, do you want to go out for a stroll today?”
Xie He, who had shown no reaction thus far, slowly turned to look at him and said, “OK.”
Han Wenqian had thought that he would refuse. He hadn’t thought that Xie He would actually agree. An excited expression emerged on his face for a split second before it turned rigid. His usual smile quickly replaced it. He asked carefully again, “Where do you want to go?”
Xie He thought it over and said, “The restaurant you took me to before. I haven’t eaten there for a long time.”
Han Wenqian immediately said, “OK. I’ll take you there.”
Han Wenqian helped Xie He dress with gentle movements. He buttoned up the other’s shirt and combed his hair. The man who hadn’t known how to take care of someone else was now used to feeding and dressing Xie He. He did it with skilled and familiar movements. Furthermore, he never looked fed up.... It was as if he were determined to wait upon Xie He like this for the rest of his life.
Xie He had also gotten used to being cared for by Han Wenqian. He didn’t move and let Han Wenqian move him as he needed.
When they left, he had glanced at the mirror. The young man in the mirror had on a white T-shirt, pale blue jeans and had a neat, tidy appearance. His short soft hair fell over his forehead. He looked like he had in the past.
Xie He had then cast his eyes down and left with Han Wenqian.
It had been a long time since Han Wenqian had come out with Xie He. He felt a bit nervous. He grasped the steering wheel with a lot of force. Finally, they arrived at a restaurant they used to frequently visit. Han Wenqian furrowed his brows as he looked at the menu, carefully mulling over what to order. He still remembered Xie He’s old favourites. It was just that some of them wouldn’t be easy to eat right now. Xie He probably wouldn’t want to be fed by him in public, so it would be best if he chose things that would be easy to eat....
After much difficulty, Han Wenqian ordered their dishes. He looked at Xie He with a bit of apprehension. With a smile, he said, “If you’re willing to come out, I can take you out every day. There are a lot of places to have fun and eat at. I can take you to all of them”
Xie He stared at Han Wenqian and suddenly smiled. His gaze was soft. “You treat me really well.”
Han Wenqian’s stopped breathing for a moment. Xie He actually smiled at him.... He looked at Xie He’s smile, greedily taking it in. There was a bitter taste in his throat. After some time, he said, “It’s what I ought to do.”
Shortly after, the dishes came. Xie He had not left the house in a long time. He missed being outside very much. He would eat and then gaze out the glass window, watching the stream of people passing by.... There was a complicated emotion in his eyes.
Xie He suddenly turned to say to Han Wenqian, “Ge, it would have been good if none of that had happened.”
There was sadness and pain in Han Wenqian’s eyes. How could he not think the same? It would be good if none of that had happened...that way, he could always be the other’s good big brother. He could always take care of him and protect him. Even if he could only watch him silently, he was willing to do that.
At this moment, Xie He’s lips curled up into a pure, shy smile. Faint dimples appeared on his cheeks. With a soft voice, he said, “If those things didn’t happen, maybe I would have fallen in love with you.”
Han Wenqian stared at Xie He in shock at once. His lips trembled.
At this moment, no words could describe what he was feeling. The person he loved dearly had said, “If those things didn’t happen, maybe I would have fallen in love with you.”
Han Wenqian could not control the preposterous fantasy growing in his chest. He fantasized about a world where none of this happened, where he could hold the person in front of him in his arms. They would definitely be happy....
Although it was nothing but his imagination, Han Wenqian was content with what he had. He knew that being able to hear these words today was already the closest he’d get to happiness in this lifetime. He would not wish for more.
【Ding, the target Han Wenqian’s Favourability Value +1. The current Favourability Value is 100.】
【Ding, the target of this world, Han Wenqian, has been successfully captured. 10,000 experience points obtained. The important character of this world, Qin Ye, has been successfully captured. 8000 experience points have been obtained. The total amount of experience points earned in this world is 18,000. 】